Feeling Loved

 

 

Patricia DeSandro  2011

While thinking about the different mythologies around the world involving a Divine Child and the nurturing of that child who would become the Light of the World, I mused on whether or not the Divine Child was ever scolded. I wondered if that child knew every moment how much he was loved. That got me thinking about my children. I thought about all those times I scolded unnecessarily and hoped my children realized how much I loved them, even when I was angry.

That led to me thinking about my own childhood. It was a different era. Childrearing is so different now. We understand so much more now about what a child needs. Old resentments started to rise in me. I looked closely at how my parents were raised and what their influences and mindsets were. Putting their actions into that context brought them into sharper focus. What were their intentions? They raised me the best they knew how. They had good intentions, but I often felt unloved.

This doesn’t mean it was true. My parents both mentioned once or twice about how unloved they felt at certain times in their lives. I blamed my grandparents for that and I blamed my parents for making me feel unloved in turn. Each generation struggles with doing a better job than the generation before them. We are supposed to be smarter, more compassionate, more evolved. We are certain that we have learned from our ancestors’ mistakes. That doesn’t make us perfect. Our children might tell us one day about a time they felt unloved, and we would know in our hearts that we did love them. There are times when our children are struggling with the angst of growing up, when we as parents will feel unloved by our children, and our children would know in their hearts that they do love us.

Are you able to be compassionate or kind to someone else? Do you strive for fairness? Do you love someone? If you answer yes to these questions, then you have known love. Love begets love; that is the truth. We are not perfect human beings. We will make mistakes. But that doesn’t mean we don’t love each other. The human race has survived despite thousands of years of horrible atrocities inflicted against itself because a child is born and someone, somewhere will love that child. That child will, in turn, love someone else.

We tend to focus in this era on what we as humans have done wrong. It is important to do that so changes can be made, but maybe we could also acknowledge that love isn’t dead. We can help each other remember that we are living proof of that fact.

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